Vol. IV, Iss. 2 - February 2006
The latest from Student Leadership University

Now that all the chocolate has disappeared and all of the Valentines have been sent, we at SLU wanted to shake things up a bit with this month’s Edge …perhaps a result of all the chocolate we consumed! You have been warned, proceed with caution this month.  From the articles to quotes, we decided to have a little fun while looking at one of the most critical issues in the eyes of every young person- dating and relationships.

As a Christian teenager, you are bombarded everyday with the world’s concept of love, and sadly, it always ends up looking like something temporary, empty, and meaningless.  Tommy Nelson of the Song of Solomon conferences goes as far as saying, “Everyday young people across the country experience the pain and heartache of sexuality out of control- Our culture is out of control regarding their view on dating and sex! The way many students approach love and dating can be harmful.”  So how do you do it?  How do you as Dr. Jay says “not sacrifice your future on the alter of the immediate?”  How do you, as a young person trying to hold the line of integrity in your life, experience the real joy of dating?

Well, the answer is not simple, and you already have the best resources around you in your parents, your church family, and the Bible. Yet, we decided to send some extra resources your way that will hopefully make you laugh and also make you think a little more about how God would want you to handle this area of your life.  So whether you are one of those that is feeling the affects of Cupid’s arrows or just one of those that is glad that Valentine’s is over because you regard it as “Singleness Awareness Day (SAD),”  there is something in this month’s Edge for you as you explore the joy of dating.  Have fun!

Nikki Finch is the Program Director for SLU. Her articles appear throughout the year.

In the wake of Valentine’s Day, relationships are on everyone’s mind and everyone has advice to give.  In that spirit, I’d like to share with you some relationship advice from one of the smartest guys I know, my Dad.  Like most young men, during my time in High School I received a wealth of unsolicited advice from Dad about girls and relationships that, at the time, I didn’t want to hear.  Rather than heeding this advice I decided that I, wise beyond my years at the ripe age of 16, needed no assistance in navigating the minefield of relationships my own.  I actually made it about three steps before the first explosion.  Looking back I see the truth of Proverbs 12:15: “The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.”  As it turns out, Dad was right about girls and I share his advice with you.

The core of Dad’s advice on High School relationships was to Focus on Christ, and walk towards Him.  It is a simple principal that has massive implications to all areas of life.  But is something we often don’t think to apply to our relationships, especially in High School.  The truth is that, as you have likely seen countless times, High School relationships more often than not meet an untimely demise.  Because they rarely bear fruit, they normally serve only as a distraction; calling attention away from Christ.  Dad encouraged me to simply concentrate on the tasks before me, that being school, and in those tasks to focus and walk towards Him.  As I heard this advice I recognized the truth in it.  Sadly, I failed to apply it.

Instead of focusing, I found myself looking away from Christ to pursue dating relationships which would turn out to be fruitless.  I was distracted from my pursuit of Him by the appeal of the significance I believed I would find in a dating relationship.  Today, as I look back, I can’t help but wonder, “what if?”  What if I had given all that time, energy, and personal resources I spent on broken relationships to God?  Or what if I had put all of the money I spent on Valentine’s Day gifts, and one month anniversary gifts, and greeting cards into the stock market?  I’m pretty sure that if I had done so I would be a millionaire today.  Dad was right and I had allowed girls to become a major distraction in my life.

But, Dad made another prediction; that someday, as I was walking, I would notice in my peripheral vision someone walking beside me.  That someone would have the same passions, interests, and be on the same path as I.  But even then he admonished me to not look away from Christ to glance at this person, but walk towards Christ alongside her.  As much as I didn’t want to listen at the time, as much as I thought I could handle a relationship without being distracted, Dad was right.  The truth was that as a High School student I didn’t know enough about myself or God’s path for my own life to determine who were going to be walking on the same path.  Years later I also realized that Dad’s second prediction was also right, I didn’t have to look for this woman as long as I was seeking whole heartedly after Christ.  It is true that if you “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”  Psalm 37:4.  As for me, after finding the path for my own life I noticed one day, in my peripheral vision, that someone was walking beside me on the same path.  She had the same vision and goals and interests as I do.  She was sure of the path she was called to and it is the same one I am called to.  So I asked her to marry me.  Dad was right all along, and if I had only listened I could have saved myself and others a lot of heartache.

So what about you?  This year over Valentine’s Day have you been distracted by the luring appeal of relationships that draws your attention away from Christ?  I encourage you to use this time in your life to establish those habits of a leader, to seek the path that God has for you.  Be faithful to walking towards and pursuing Christ and then, when you realize there is someone beside you, you will be able to walk together for the glory of our King.  I hope my father’s advice for me can serve as an encouragement for you, but also a reminder to listen to heed the advice of our parents.  They walked the road of life ahead of us and even though we don’t always like to admit it, they have some pretty valuable counsel to give.

Joshua Grosshans is a third-year law student at Florida State University who will soon be graduating and receiving his law degree. Josh has also served as a Staff Member for SLU 201 in Washington, D.C.

The speakers at SLU are always exciting to hear. We got to hear from HRH Prince Michael of Kent, Sir Nicholas Soames, Dr. Jay Strack, and many others. I really enjoyed listening to each speaker as they shared about their lives and things they have learned. Dr. Bob Reccord shared a quote with us and encouraged us to use it as a prayer for our lives. It was about having the strength to go anywhere God leads us just as long as He stays with us. Things will change or be taken away from us in life but we always have God right beside us even when things are hard. I went to Nicaragua on a mission trip not long ago and shared the prayer with some Nicaraguans in church one night. I told them it had spoken to my heart and I wanted to share with others that God is always with us.

Student Leadership University has many great trips planned for young people where you can sightsee and learn. I have gotten to visit the Royal Automobile Club in England , a place not many people get to go see. I love to travel and see new things which made SLU a perfect trip for me. Jay Strack makes sure we enjoy ourselves and still learn about leadership.  Student Leadership University has been a wonderful experience for me to learn from other leaders. I think when I'm older I'll come back with SLU as a chaperone because I know how much it has changed my life. Student Leadership University is an amazing experience and I hope more teenagers will go on these trips. I know they will learn and enjoy themselves as much as have with SLU.

Katie B. is a graduate of SLU. Her SLU story is also featured on our website. Every month, we feature the story of an SLU graduate whose life has been impacted by SLU in significant ways. Have an SLU story? Send it to us at edge@studentleadership.net